end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
