You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
