I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
