): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
