Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
