drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
