"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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