so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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