Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
