No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
