last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
