This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
