OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
