Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
