omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
he quoted the bible to break up with me
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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