i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Umm I'm too high to move.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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