YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
