things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
