Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
