Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
