took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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