I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
