he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
areolas are like halos for boobs.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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