If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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