I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
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