You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Randomize
