Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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