you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
