I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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