I need help removing her.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Just pee around me
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize
