Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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