accomplished twins. life is a go
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
