We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
