would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
foreskin is a definite game changer
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
