do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
