Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
