hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
