At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
My life is pants optional.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
