i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
