his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
