i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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