They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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