if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
