Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
