The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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