Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
