No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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