3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
