took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Come back. Shots need mouths.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
