i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I am available for nakedness
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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