who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
he puts the penis in happiness.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
