that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
no you cant smoke seaweed
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
